If You Sit Still, It Will Cool Down

Lessons From the Greatest Woman I've Known

I recently interviewed a pastor for a client of mine—a construction company that just finished some beautiful renovations on his church. We were there for a testimonial, but as these things often go, the conversation veered into the deep stuff.

He showed me a video about patience; specifically, about the season God uses to develop you before putting you in the position He has marked for you.

The keyword was Patience. Now, if you know me, you know patience is a virtue I do not have. Never had it. I want the blimp in the sky. I want the dream with the specific dates and numbers. I need to know the when. But as I’m learning as a 34-year-old woman building a business and a podcast, the Lord isn’t always into giving out timelines. He’s into preparation.

This brought me back to a story about my grandma, Effie.

To me, Grandma was the greatest person in the world. I enjoyed her more than life itself—more than my parents (love them dearly, but they get on my nerves, which is a separate story). She and her family came from a farm in Keysville, Virginia, before moving to Richmond. When you grow up on a farm with those Keysville summers and winters, you learn to value climate control.

When Grandma got her own place in Richmond, she was in charge of the thermostat. If it was cold outside, it was going to be warm inside. For the rest of us, it was blazing. If you’re a Black person with a grandparent, you know exactly the heat I’m talking about.

My nickname was Rabbit. I earned it because I was always bouncing around her house—my favorite place to be—usually right under her while she watched The Price is Right or her “stories.”

Whenever I’d complain that I was roasting, Grandma would look at me and say:

“If you sit still, it will cool down.”

In the literal sense, she was telling an 8-year-old to stop jumping around so her body temp would drop. But since her passing, that seed she planted has started to bloom into something much bigger.

At 34, I finally understand the other side of that meaning.

If you sit still—if you stop the frantic bouncing and just wait for the things that have been lined up for you—they will come. Will they come when I want them to? No. And that’s my struggle. I’m still looking for the sign in the clouds.

But I’ve realized that in life, Grandma taught me a lot. In death, she taught me even more because I finally had the time to sit and think about what she was actually saying.

Telling an 8-year-old to sit down was a practical command. Telling 34-year-old me to sit still is a spiritual strategy. I don’t need to know the when; I just need to be prepared for when the when arrives.

So, for anyone else out there bouncing around, trying to force the timing of their next big move: Just sit still. It’ll cool down. The things meant for you aren’t going to miss you.