The Jean Jacket Revelation

I recently reached back out to an HR Director from an organization I interviewed with earlier this year. I had made it to the final round, didn’t get the job, and decided to circle back to ask for feedback—not just on the role, but on my podcast, Suit N Screen. I wanted to know if my insights were hitting home for people currently in the job market.

I didn’t necessarily get the podcast feedback I expected, but I got something much better: Validation. I got the “Why” behind the “No,” and it solidified the belief that God moves things out of your way for a specific reason.

The Role I Thought I Wanted

I really wanted this position. I saw an opportunity to take a marketing department from an abysmal standpoint and build something exceptional. I had done the research. I had audited their newsletters. I had a “Day One” plan of action ready to go. I was ready to dig my teeth in and expand the entire company.

Then, the HR Director told me why I wasn’t selected.

First, she said the team felt I “wasn’t serious about the role.” This was a shock, considering I had mapped out an entire multi-step growth strategy for them before I even had a desk.

Then came the real kicker: The firm and its clients are “conservative,” and my attire played a factor. For reference, I was wearing ironed khakis and a blouse. Because it was cold, I threw on a jean jacket.

Apparently, that denim was enough to signal that I wasn’t “serious.”

The “Aha” Moment

As she was talking, a lightbulb went off. My brain immediately said: “This is exactly why you aren’t over there, Amber. And it’s exactly why you don’t want to be.”

What I heard in that feedback was: “We heard nothing you said about the potential of our firm. We didn’t listen to the strategic roadmap you laid out. We just looked at your jacket.”

They weren’t listening to the words coming out of my mouth; they were stuck on a piece of fabric.

To the Laid Off and the “Passed Over”

I’m sharing this for anyone who has been laid off or who just lost out on a “dream job.” Sometimes the reason you didn’t get it is something minuscule—something you can’t control. Maybe they didn’t like your hair, your name, or a joke you made.

But here is the truth: A “No” is often a redirection or a rescue. If I had gotten that job, I would have been terribly miserable. I would have been right back in a situation where my value was measured by my “look” rather than my “output.” I would have been stifled in an environment that prioritizes tradition over transformation.

The Lesson: Vibe-Check the Interviewer

We spend so much time worrying if a company wants us that we forget to ask if we actually want them. You need to be in a place where your strategic mind is valued more than your denim.

Where you think you need to be is not always where you actually need to be. Sometimes, that jean jacket is the best filter you ever wore.